…Well, one long term effect. For me.
I worry about and see anger in everyone. I want to appease it, and apologize for it, even if it has nothing to do with me.
Perceived anger frightens me.
Someone was trying to get in the front door of our complex, but it’s locked. They walked back around. I’m assuming they grabbed a key, then tried again. They looked frustrated when it didn’t work.
I started to become scared. I wanted to both hide, and walk over to see if I could help in any way.
It had nothing to do with me, but I reacted as if I needed to fix it because they were mad at me specifically (I’m not even sure the woman knows anyone is home in my apartment)…
My heart is still racing. I’m still ambivalent. It happened 20 minutes ago.
I’m doing nothing wrong. The woman isn’t here for anything related to me, yet I’m scared she will come in and yell at me…
G would have done that. He was (and is) unpredictable and volatile.
This woman is not G.
I will keep repeating that to myself until my inner kid believes it (or stops the panic)