Tag Archives: just do it

Pride

I woke this morning wanting to cry and stay in bed. A few days ago however, I had told myself I was going to go to pride today. I didn’t really feel like driving into the city (it gives me anxiety), but the train/tram/bus/walk route would have been 3 hours (2 hours longer than driving), and a whole lot more frustrating. So, after double-checking that none of my friends would be available to drive, I took myself. Traffic sucked, but it wasn’t as bad as I had feared. My anxiety about driving in city traffic was not activated. I parked at a garage we had parked at last year, and I walked the 20 minutes to the beach. I ended meeting up with some friends for a while, them struck out on my own again after they left.
I’m glad I went. It was fun people watching, and I found out my anxiety is not nearly as bad when I feel in control and I know what I’m doing.
I’m not sure when the anxiety started, but it’s gotten frustrating the last few years. I used to make the drive to that part of the city quite often during high school. In college, I lost my fear of having to drive in unfamiliar places. Then it came back recently. I used to have no problem striking out on my own to go places; driving 10 hours to visit a friend in another state for the weekend; heading to the islands on my own for a spontaneous weekend away… now I get anxious going to the store down the street… I miss my independence. Today was a good reminder that I used to love doing stuff like this.
Anyway, pride was fun. Going by myself and not having to worry about what others wanted to do was nice. And leaving when I wanted was liberating. I would have preferred L with me, but I didn’t mind not having to go with friends…

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And on the way home, I saw my dream car: (googly eyes for the Kermit jeep)

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first (independant) creative venture in nearly 2 weeks!

Outside of the assignments tackled in the art journal workshops, I have been having a really difficult time with artist’s block lately. Something finally gave though! I was able to doodle away a bit in my wreck this journal.

IMG_20140819_155027_zpsrkrs4k7jIt was partially inspired by the fb post of the art a mom created out of her kid’s wall scribble, and part zentangle-type stuff. After doing the initial design in black, I decided to break out the gel pens again for some color. I think I like how it came out overall.

The prompt was “draw fat lines and thin”

 


so incredibly tired

Yesterday, we headed out to the other coast for a day trip.  A friend was down for a visit, and we decided to meet up.  It was a much-needed and quite awesome experience.  My wife and I detoured on the way over and took a road that led into the swamp.  We pulled over a few times to check out some of the wildlife.  I’m so grateful that my wife indulged me like that.  I was able to get some cool pics of vultures, 2 kinds of locusts, and a box turtle (<–really cool coz I have never seen them in the wild before).  Then we headed out of a refuge where we saw more really cool critters.  THEN WE SAW WILD DOLPHINS!!!! We were at the beach taking pics and noticed a bunch of people watching something in the water.  That’s when we saw what it was: 2 adults and a baby dolphin!  L and I were not dressed to go in the water, but we figured it was a once-in-a-lifetime thing.  We pulled our wallets and phones out of our pockets.  I held everything up high in one hand and walked out taking pictures with my camera in the other (I kept forcing myself not to play out any worst-case scenarios of being knocked over by waves or tripping and losing all our electronics to the ocean water).  I waded out farther than L, and got a pretty good view of them.  They swam about 4 feet from a lady and her adult son.  We must have watched them for a good 15 minutes before they swam off towards the gulf.  Luckily L and I had remembered to bring a change of clothes with us so we were not soaked the whole rest of the day.  We were definitely on a high the rest of the day though.

We got home just after 11pm, but my head was already spinning with how tired I was by the time I pulled the car into the driveway.  I slept like a rock and had a lot of trouble getting up in the morning.  I was able to stay awake for a few hours before that same head-spinning, “about to pass out I’m so tired” feeling hit again.  I crawled back into bed to sleep for another 2 hours.   I’ve been up for less than 2 hours, and that feeling is back.  I thought it may be from not eating enough today, but even having dinner has not helped much.  I guess I really tired myself out these last few weeks.  But yesterday was totally worth it. We got to cross 2 things off our bucket list…