Saw TM today, and it was a really good session. I had planned on going in asking her to “do” something together (game, coloring, play cards, something) and she was apparently on the same wavelength (woo-hoo!). Either last session or the session before, she had mentioned containment and having a metaphorical “place” to keep all the memories between sessions. We kinda brainstormed a bit, and she suggested the pensieve from Harry Potter lore. I liked the idea a lot. Pretty much, it’s a storage space for Dumbledore’s memories. If he wants to recall something, he pulls it out and “plays” it in the water… It’s a very cool concept if you ask me.
Anyway, so we spent the rest of the session drawing and coloring one out. TM did the pensieve, and I did a person pulling a memory from their brain. Thinking back on it, it matches how our roles have worked in therapy: I pull the stuff out, and it is contained with her in her office and notes. At the end of the session, she gave me her drawing to keep with mine. I want to do something representative of it actually containing stuff, but that might wait till next session. I know the point of the activity was to help me develop a method of internal containment. Her original sketch of a box with “stuff” in it was to give an example of how to metaphorically put my stuff away. I kinda feel like this week we did the ground-work for that (creating the vessel), and maybe next week we can chat about how to actually put stuff away.
When she first brought up the concept, I mentioned my metaphorical closet, and how it used to be neat an organized (before ever starting therapy). things all had their little boxes on orderly little shelves in the very back of a large walk-in closet. These days, it looks much messier, more along the lines of Monica’s secret closet at the end of the hall. If I try to open the door (sometimes even without trying to open the door), everything comes tumbling out. I think I like the idea of the pensieve much better. It doesn’t rely on organization so much as simply storing stuff away safely. It doesn’t require much to retrieve anything, and nothing ever comes tumbling out unintended. Much safer and more practical than a closet.
It was nice to have a lighter session…
(I think I may also want to make a little pensieve model for myself, where I can write stuff down and drop it in, maybe a bit like a piggy bank for thoughts and memories… and I’m itching to do more with the extra UTEE I have… I could use it for the liquid surface of the pensieve, adding shimmery pigment to help give it a magical look… Must play!)