[insert appropriate parent here]-less

I had just had several conversations with several people about this concept, and I’m happy to find it in print. I did not read the whole thing, because it is long and my Benadryl is kicking in (it is also a bit detailed on some of the “milder” abuse).  Anyway, here’s the link to the blog on being “motherless” by choice.

I think it’s important to understand that everyone has their reasons for cutting someone out off their lives; often, it’s a damn good reason.  It’s a difficult decision made more so by others’ reactions to the choice.  Aside of my therapist, my wife, and recently my mother, no one gets the concept of why I would ever cut my father out of my life (least of all him).  I feel the need to defend my choices when I am told “but he is your father!”  or “family is the most important thing in life” when in reality, it’s being able to live safely and happily (or some measure of happiness and safety, even if you are not necessarily safe from yourself, but that’s a whole other topic).  We need to stop judging people. Without knowing anyone’s full story, we cannot make informed decisions about what they choose to do with their lives (and the people in it), and we will never be fully able to understand another’s plight as long as we are busy forming opinions and judgements about everything…


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